Something to Keep
“Be more concerned with your character than your reputation, because your character is what you really are, while your reputation is merely what others think you are…the true test of a man’s character is what he does when no one is watching.”
John Wooden
A Second Look
I’ve written about integrity before. Although reputation is about how others perceive you, character is how you perceive yourself. I believe the latter is more important, especially as you grow older and you (hopefully) stop spending so much time getting people to like you.
By no means am I trying to suggest that younger people can’t have integrity. I’m simply suggesting that the quality is rarer in youngsters (or older people with midlife crises). When we’re young, we think being liked is the most important thing. From experience, I’ve realized that getting to like myself is even more important.
Anyone who’s into self-development has fallen into the trap of consuming too much content. But you won’t solve most of your problems by reading books or watching TikTok therapists. Sometimes you have to go through your days and ask yourself one simple question: “Did I live in a way that the person I want to become would respect?”
There’s no shame in answering with a “no”. We all tend to be too strict with ourselves, but the important part is to lean towards integrity more often than not. No self-help book is going to tell you that integrity is about living in a way where you’re aligned with your values. No one will spend twenty bucks on a one-page book that tells you something incredibly hard, even if that’s what you need to hear.
Self-help books will overwhelm you with facts and stories about WWII heroes. They’ll tell you how special you are and how you deserve nice things. Those books will entertain you, but they certainly won’t get you closer to being the best version of yourself. Only you can. Telling you that won’t make me any money, but that’s ok. I no longer care if people like me.
Something I Liked
As I said, I barely consume any self-development content. Sometimes I find that wisdom comes from unexpected places, especially media or history books. There’s one exception to the self-help world, and that’s Mark Manson. He’s made a career sharing contrarian wisdom, and I hope he never stops doing so.
In his latest video, Manson shares 42 lessons he’s learned throughout his life, and there are some amazing gems in there. The video only lasts eleven minutes, but some of those quotes will remain with you long after.